On another note, here's my dog:
Isn't he effin cute? The premise of this picture is actually really sad. I toss and turn trying to get to sleep most nights because D & Dexter take up so much space that I have to contort my body to try to fit into the jigsaw that is my sleeping situation. So once D wakes up and gets out of bed around 6, I take the opportunity to stretch out across the whole bed. It's nice because Dexter worships D so much that he always gets out of bed with D, leaving the bed all to MEEEEEE.
When D finally leaves, Dexter pines at the window for about ten minutes, then he realizes how effing early it is and tries to get back in bed. Now I'm sitting here, trying to think of a way to describe Dexter's company. The first word that comes to mind is "suffocating." Hm that's a little too strong. How about "no concept of personal space." Yea that's better.
So he gets back into bed and there's plenty of room on either side of me for him to stretch out. But he decides to curl up into a little ball for some reason, probably to increase his momentum (is that how physics works?). Then he curls up right up THISCLOSE next to me, which would be ok, maybe, but then he isn't even settled. It's like he's ready to lay down, he finds his spot, he plops himself down, and then he releases his breath or something, causing him to sway and then settle permanently on top of me.
It's like someone sitting next to you in the airplane that is clearly too big for their seat sucking in their gut, then sitting down, giving you the illusion that hey, maybe they aren't going to expand all over me. Then they exhale and expand all over you.
It drives me crazy, cause then I try to scoot away, and he finds a way to reposition himself and scoot closer. So I do the only thing I can, which is to exile him from the room. He won't go willingly though. I have to say, "Wanna go potty?" So he gets all excited and runs to the stairs, then I shut the door and sigh contentedly as I drift away to dreamland. I get a good couple hours of sleep in, until I wake up and remember the terrible thing I did.
It wasn't that bad but I knew when I opened the door that his sad little face would be looking at me being like, "Why? Why did you banish me? Did I do something wrong?" and I'd be like, "Well, you were just all up in my grill and I couldn't sleep," and he'd be like, "Oh. I see. So I was trying to get close and snuggle up to you, and you wanted me gone. Ok." Then I'd scream, "Stop with the $#%*ing guilt trip already!!!!!!!" while tearing my nails down my face and writhing around. Meanwhile this conversation has been happening all inside my head. Maybe I should get another dog. Oh right back to the picture.
So I did finally open the door this morning and he did the same thing to the door that he does to me, (invade its personal space). I open the door and he falls into the room because he's all stacked up against the door, expanding a;KL <
\\\t.
Ahem. As I was saying, he's all stacked up against the door, expanding all over it. Excuse my typos, but someone just invaded my lap and tried to settle down. Guess who.
Anyway the picture is him after he joyously jumped back into bed and snuggled up with my blankets. It was cute and D asked me to take a picture, so there you have it.
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