Monday, November 8, 2010

Dexter: Season 5 Episode 7, plus I hate on Deb for awhile

I don't really feel like rehashing my stupid weekend from the last post so I am going to continue that later on. Sorry for those of you who were on the edge of your seat for the last week and a half. I'm flattered, but you all should really stop centering your life around my blog posts - it isn't healthy!

I think instead I am going to talk about... Dexter. The show, not my dog. Sorry Dexter 2. That 2 indicates that he came into my life 2nd in time, but he will always be number 1 in importance. Unless Dexter somehow gets insanely better, if that's even possible. Maybe if they replaced the whole cast with dogs that would be a good start. Can you even imagine? I'm just picturing what kind of dog they could use to sum up that asshole Quinn. God I hate him.

I don't usually review shows like this unless I hate them (see psychic rants) but my brother Darrell called me last night wanting to talk about True Blood so maybe I am just in the mood to talk turkey about television. I hate alliteration. Why did I just put myself through that? Ahem, back to my convo about True Blood. Darrell & I were chitchatting about Eric and Sam and all of my favorite characters on there. I just realized that we didn't even MENTION Lafayette. Dang! His storyline must be boring as hell because he is totally my favorite character and I didn't even think to talk about him. Sadface.

We talked about True Blood and other such worldly topics for awhile and then I watched the latest episode of Dexter and went to bed. By went to bed, I mean to say I procrastinated for a couple of hours, lollygagging if you will, and trying to extend my 48 minutes of Dexter. Once I am done watching an episode and there are no more left to watch, I look for reviews online so I can somehow lengthen the experience, like the episode is not really over yet.

I read a review that was just terrible. Terrible grammar and terribly written. Not exciting, no big words, nothing! So maybe that's another reason I want to write my own sort of review. I think I really just want to talk about Dexter to somehow stretch it even thinner so I don't have to think about how the next episode is not on for another 6 days. Agony!

Dexter: Season 5, Episode 7
"Circle Us"
SPOILERS! For the whole 5 seasons, just because I can.

What the crap was that nanny thinking, putting up some kind of religious relic over someone else's baby? I swear. I loved how Dexter said it was the most boring action figure ever. But seriously, that nanny chick is weird. I feel like every time Dexter leaves the house he has to worry about getting back at a reasonable hour. Ok that sounds stupid on my part. I don't know... just something about her rubs me the wrong way. Why is she given any storyline at all? Maybe she has a dark secret!! Or maybe that's just wishful thinking on my part!!

Secondly, but most importantly, Quinn needs to die. I am seriously hoping that this season ends with Dexter finding mad dirt on Quinn and killing his ass. What if Quinn was part of the ring of douchers that Dexter & Lumen are looking for now - wouldn't that be fantastic!? I'm sure Dexter would have something really witty and hilarious to say to Quinn while he was on the chopping block but I'm afraid a girl will just have to dream. I could supply some phrases though. "Well aren't we in a quinn-dary now!" HAHAHA! Man I crack myself up. Moving on!

Deb - what are you doing with Quinn, that asshole from the last paragraph? Deb's guy-dar is seriously broken. She needs to get that shit fixed pronto. First boyfriend from Season 1 was harmless, but a huge loser who had his paws all over Deb at lunch with Dexter and Rita, cause that spells CLASS. Then the Ice-Truck Killer proposes to her after like 2 weeks and she is all, Yes! Yes! I think he summed it up best when he said, "You were so desperate to be loved." It's true.

And isn't Deb still perpetuating this same crap over and over again with every guy she hooks up with? Who is next from Season 2... oh right, the guy from the gym, Gabriel. He was actually a nice guy but of course she effed it up, but she did redeem herself by choosing Lundy. He was a classy guy! Then he left to go skiing or something, I never really got that part but I do remember Deb wearing a ski hat. I liked Anton from Season 3 but still, she seems like such a snob when she's like, I can't date him.. DAD wouldn't approve. Girl, grow up! Dad is way too focused on Dexter, even in the afterlife. He could care less who you are nailing.

Season 4 - Lundy. That was sad. I liked Lundy and when you find out who actually killed him and why - oh my god. I wanted to kill that bitch myself. Then she asked Deb for forgiveness, what the hell was that? Ahh... ok now season 5, Quinn.

Deb: I don't want to be alone tonight.
Quinn: I'm no good for you.
Deb: I'm not looking for good.

Way to set the bar high, girl! You basically just admitted that Quinn is a piece of trash but you don't care as long as there is some booty in it for you. Sad day for womenkind everywhere. And poor Dexter, having to see that butthole in his apartment while Deb is supposed to be watching the baby. Seriously Deb - come on!

Wow I had to rant about Deb for awhile - I covered 5 seasons of crappy Deb decisions. Now back to Season 5 Episode 7. What is Lumen's deal? I mean, she is ok and stuff, but I honestly don't even feel like talking about her because she kind of sucks. I think I just wish she was an unknown actress instead of Julia Stiles. I keep thinking of other movies she has been in and how weird this role is for her. And god I really hope nothing romantic develops between them. They shared an awkward hug at the end of this episode that made me want to vomit. Stick to the handshakes, Dexter, and all will be well.

Hmm have I missed anything? I mean, the shooting at the club. I knew it was not going to end well for that chick who was supposed to be helping out the cops. Yasmin? Jasmine? I can't remember her name. LaGuerta totally dropped the ball by ordering the cop to go hang out with the Fuentes brothers. Then she said if anyone made any mistakes, it wasn't her! Poor Angel, just trying to help out with his adorable accent. He is such a cuddly teddy bear.

Final note: How disgusting is Liddy? I think it's a sign that he's a good actor but ugh, he makes my skin crawl. Typical for a dirty cop to blame the person that nailed him though. Sounds like something Quinn would say. Maybe he's on the same path (fingers crossed!!).

Aaaaand scene! I hope you enjoyed my recap of "Circle Us" as well as recaps from other various episodes throughout the lifetime of Dexter. On a completely unrelated note, on Friday my neighbor asked me if I have ADD. Adios!